August 6, 2013

50 Most Intriguing College Games of the Year

(in chronological order)

The proliferation of blogs and social media platforms have devalued journalism and increasingly turned the internet into a never-ending series of lists and 140 character rants. For us, administrators of a sparsely-read, poorly written sports handicapping blog, this is an amazing trend, because the last thing we want to do is devote a bunch of time and effort into producing original, thought-provoking content. We'll leave that to the experts: Penthouse Forum.   

So what follows is a list of the 50 Most Intriguing College Games of the Year as we see them on August 6. The list, of course, is extremely fluid. As the season progresses, on and off-the-field events are sure to elevate certain games and marginalize others. In a month, players we hardly knew, teams we vastly overrated and suspensions that have could be handed down – hello, Johnny Manziel – will turn this list upside down. Remember, the last three Heisman Trophy winners – Cam Newton, Robert Griffin III and Manziel – were not household names going into the season in which they won it.

Also, keep in mind that The Crew is headquartered in Seattle and came of age professionally in Arizona – which not only explains the clear West Coast bias but the near absence of games involving ACC, Big 10 and Big 12 teams. Just as you might care very little about BYU-Boise, we are equally apathetic about Texas Tech-Baylor or Ohio State-Penn St (for now)

1. Mississippi St. – Oklahoma St. (8/31): T. Boone Pickens is so pissed about the new Oregon facilities.
2. Clemson – Georgia (8/31): This could begin an impressive, early-season run by the Tigers – who will later ruin it all by getting blasted by some shitty ACC team, like they always seem to do.  
3. Virginia Tech – Alabama (8/31): This is actually should not be on the list, but we had to get to 50 somehow. Tide by 35.
4. Boise St. – Washington (8/31): Washington re-opens their renovated stadium in a re-match of last year’s Las Vegas Bowl, which Boise won handily thanks to the erratic play of Washington quarterback Keith Price. We considered going, but once we learned that Price still plays quarterback for UW that was really all we needed to know.
5. LSU – TCU (8/31): As Manziel’s status is up in the air due to a potential violation of a duplicitous NCAA by-law that serves only to feed the monstrous beast, LSU is allowed to have a player on their roster who forced himself on 14-year old girl. Fuck off, NCAA.
6. Northwestern – Cal (8/31): The Wildcats went 10-3 last season, including their first bowl win since 1948. But the Big Ten traditionally has not fared going west. Watch out for hippies in trees.
7. Florida – Miami (9/7): 75 percent chance this gets postponed due to a hurricane.
8. South Carolina – Georgia (9/7):  This should be on a shirt. And if it is, let us know, so we can buy one.
9. Notre Dame – Michigan (9/7): College football is littered with obnoxious, delusional fan bases. These two are near the top of the list – which almost makes us happy that the two schools will not meet in the near future.
10. Oregon – Virginia (9/7): Oregon should hammer UVA. But it’s a long way from home, and it’s the first semi-test for the Ducks under new head coach Mark Helfrich. Plus, it gives us an early look at the Oregon cheerleaders.
11. West Virginia – Oklahoma (9/7): The total could reach 120 before kickoff.
12. Alabama – Texas A&M (9/14): A mid-September, afternoon kick in southeast Texas. What could go wrong? With Manziel, it’s the game of the year. Without him, the Aggies don’t stay within three touchdowns.
13. UCLA – Nebraska (9/14): Nebraska desperately wants the nation to care about them again. UCLA desperately wants someone on their own campus to care about them, period.
14. Vanderbilt – South Carolina (9/14): Not sure why this game is on the list either. But Vandy is on the upswing, and with South Carolina’s continued quarterback woes it should be compelling.
15. Wisconsin – Arizona State (9/14): Perhaps the drunkest school in the country meets the STDest.
16. Michigan State – Notre Dame (9/21): This game is actually terrible. Not sure how it’s on this list. See Virginia Tech – Alabama.
17. Utah – BYU (9/21): Extraordinarily underrated game on the national scene. Plus, BYU’s cheerleaders are surprisingly fantastic.
18. Arizona State – Stanford (9/21): Very similar institutions academically. We’ll give the edge to Stanford based on reputation alone.
19. Wisconsin – Ohio St. (9/28): Potentially one of the few obstacles the Buckeyes will face this season. Nice schedule. Nice conference.
20. LSU – Georgia (9/28): Coming from the Pacific Northwest, The Crew might not translate too well in certain parts of the South. Athens is the one place we could probably survive without getting jumped.
21. Oklahoma – Notre Dame (9/28): If there’s one thing we have learned over the last couple years, it’s that Tommy Rees can light up the likes of Army and Navy. We’ve also learned that he struggles against just about everyone else. It’s very possible the Irish will enter the contest with two losses.
22. USC – Arizona St (9/28): No one cares about this game but us.
23. LSU – Mississippi State (10/5): Starkville, Mississippi is like Hiroshima in the late 40s, but without all the charm.
24. Arizona State – Notre Dame (10/5): Notre Dame is known for this image, while ASU is known for images like these.  
25. Ohio State – Northwestern (10/5): As Pat Forde -- who is one of the great college football writers in the country when he’s not clogging up our Twitter feed with Kentucky high school swimming results -- astutely pointed out recently, this is a classic trap game for the Buckeyes: The Wildcats will be coming off a bye, and Ohio State plays Wisconsin the previous week.
26. Florida – LSU (10/12): Might be the drunkest game of the year.
27. Oklahoma – Texas (10/12): Mack might be done if they get hammered again this year.
28. Oregon – Washington (10/12): Steve Sarkisian named his about ‘Noah’s Sark’ after one of his sons, Noah. Cute. It’d be cuter if the Huskies won more games. But UW has played top teams tough in Seattle during his tenure, upsetting USC and Stanford, who both ranked in the top 10 at the time. 
29. UCLA – Stanford (10/19): This has to be the worst looking sorority at UCLA. Get serious about your profession, Coach. A for effort, however.
30. Florida State – Clemson (10/19): Clemson might have the best uniforms in the country. Should be enough to pull this one out.
31. USC – Notre Dame (10/19): Sixty year-old white guys still think this is the game.
32. UCLA – Oregon (10/26): Clear Northwest bias here 
33. USC – Oregon St. (11/1): See above 
34. Miami – Florida St (11/2): Twenty years ago, you’d put a shiv in your mother to see this matchup.
35. Georgia – Florida (11/2): If The Crew didn’t have firm policy against stepping foot in the state Florida, the cocktail party would be on our bucket list.
36. Oregon – Stanford (11/7): The game is too good for snark.
37. LSU – Alabama (11/9): See above.
38. Stanford – USC (11/16): Perhaps the biggest coaching mismatch all year.   
39. Oklahoma St – Texas (11/16): The Cowboys could very easily be undefeated. Mack Brown could very easily be coaching for his job.
40. Florida – South Carolina (11/16): Two top ten teams and it’s not a stretch to say that this is the fourth or fifth best SEC regular season game. The SEC is awesome.  
41. Texas A&M – LSU (11/23): Should Manziel be suspended, he should troll the world and show up on the sideline wearing a Jeremy Hill jersey.
42. Oregon St – Oregon (11/29): Underrated in-state rivalry that has taken on added importance in recent years. If nothing else, it’s another opportunity to see the Oregon cheerleaders.
43. Ohio State – Michigan (11/30): It only took the Big Ten nearly two decades to learn that playing the final regular season game before Thanksgiving wasn’t in the conference’s best interest.
44. Alabama – Auburn (11/30): We’ll be looking to tease this down to Alabama, -55.5
45. Arizona – Arizona State (11/30): The football is terrible, but few fan bases hate each other more and are less accomplished academically. Makes for a total shit show.
46. Notre Dame – Stanford (11/30): No one knew it at the time, but it was one of the games of the year in 2012. Stanford got bent over by the refs. The Irish shouldn't expect the same favorable treatment this season.
47. UCLA-USC (11/30): Might be the only time this season when Kiffin isn’t the most unlikable coach on the sideline.
48. Florida – Florida State (11/30): See Miami – Florida St. But this one is starting to get good again. (and if you can squeeze in ‘get good’ into any piece of writing, it obviously elevates the dialogue).
49. Clemson – South Carolina (11/30): Just like ASU-Arizona, this game is nasty and the fan bases have a visceral hatred for one another. The difference is these teams can actually play.  
50. Oklahoma – Oklahoma St (11/30): T. Boone is still pissed at Phil Knight.